January always feels like a doorway.

New vision. New expectations. A quiet invitation to step forward after closing the chapter on the year before.

But welcoming January hasn’t been simple for me.

This month holds both victories and losses. It’s the month I gave birth to Michael. The month we got Bao. And the month my brother passed away. Because of that, January carries some of my sweetest memories—and some of my heaviest grief.

Grief is strange. It doesn’t follow rules or timelines. It comes in waves I still don’t fully understand. I still cry for my brother. And now, my heart also aches for my dog. This month brings all the should’ve, could’ve, would’ve moments. And while I know I can’t change the fact that they’re gone, I’m learning to welcome January with a grateful heart—and with faith that there can still be triumph even in the midst of loss.